Officiating a wedding is beautiful. Officiating a vow renewal is wonderful.
Although I love coaching couples through the planning of their wedding ceremony, I have to say that there is something even more magical about celebrating a relationship that’s stood the test of time, experienced both joy and pain, gone through hardships and emerged victorious.
Today and more than ever, I understand and honor the beauty of this meaningful gesture. Truth be told, I am seriously considering it for myself in the near future 😉
Just you and your partner, with a select few and eloping to a dream place, or with everyone you love, there are many ways to renew your vows.
Here are 5 very good reasons which might just convince you.
1. Nothing Should Be Taken for Granted
Marriage is not an ending, it is the beginning of a big adventure. You sign a marriage contract, you commit to loving each other, but none of these gestures ensures that your marriage will last. Deciding what do to with your marriage, how to nurture it, is what makes a marriage last and grow.
In our day-to-day life, most contracts must be renewed to stay in effect. But a marriage contract does not abide by these rules. In fact, as with many milestones in life, you’re not handed a manual after you get married… We tend to forget that nothing should be taken for granted, and that, beyond love, a marriage needs work, nurturing, investment and a lot of patience.
Renewing your vows after X years of marriage is about telling your better half how happy you are to be with them. That you intend to continue to nurture this relationship. That, despite the fleeting nature of time and the challenges and ordeals that you are bound to face, you want to walk the same path together, hand in hand. And that you want to commit, once more, to going out of your way to achieve that goal.
2. Being in a Successful Marriage Is a Strength
In a world that may seem out of a control and with far too many divorces, staying in a committed marriage with an unbreakable bond is nothing short of extraordinary.
For a long time, getting married was considered a victory. Today, it’s about keeping your marriage strong. As we tend to celebrate the milestones in our lives, why not embrace this one fully?
You may want to renew your vows because you went through a separation or came dangerously close to one. That is an excellent reason. You may also, quite simply, choose to celebrate how successful your relationship is. Bask in your happiness, we don’t do it nearly enough.
3. It Is a Wonderful Gift to Give Yourself
Some couples choose to treat themselves to a romantic or family getaway to honor their marriage anniversary. Others travel across the world to celebrate this occasion. Why not simply take the opportunity to take stock of your relationship and let your better half know how you feel about them? Opportunities to profess our love are few and far between in our day-to-day life, but small tokens of appreciation are the backbone of any successful relationship.
You may want to plan a small and intimate ceremony with just the two of you, or with a few privileged witnesses (your best man and maid of honor for instance).
If you invite more guests, you may want to focus on the party that can be introduced by a lovely ceremony carried out in a spirit of joy and sharing.
4. It Is an Opportunity to Have Your Children Take Part in the Ceremony
A wedding often precedes the arrival of a child. Renewing your vows is a wonderful way to include them in a ceremony that looks like the wedding ceremony of their parents. What a beautiful moment for a child to hear their parents express how much they love each other and what they envision for their future together!
You may also include your kid(s) in a symbolic ritual.
5. You Didn’t Get to Have Your Dream Wedding
Secular ceremonies are relatively new. Back then, there was no true alternative for those who did not wish to get married in a church.
Many couples I meet tell me about the wedding they had envisioned and wish they had had; a secular ceremony would have been perfect for them. Some didn’t have the budget to plan the wedding of their dreams. Others have regrets about how their wedding went down.
Renewing your vows is giving yourself your dream wedding, with all the maturity and strength that the years have given your relationship. Like a statement of the years gone by and a wonderful window to the years to come.
A Few Parting Words
There are many reasons you might want to consider renewing your vows, once or even several times to mark every milestone in your life.
What are your thoughts on the subject? Is this something you’d like to do? How do you picture it? If you went through with it, how did it feel? I am very curious to know how this article makes you feel.
And if you want some visual aids to picture this wonderful ceremony, please check out my Pinterest board on the subject.